Miyerkules, Hunyo 5, 2013

Now I'm Free



June 1, 2013. I will never forget this day. This is the day that finally I confessed my feelings for him.




     I fear that what we have will changed. I fear that he won't understands me. I fear of losing our friendship. I fear of losing him...

I was actually planning of telling him everything next month. On the contrary, I am happy I finally did it earlier. Our night started with a fun conversation. We laughed till we dare each other on a game where I lost  :)...and I ended up confessing to him. I feel so relieved that finally he knows how I feel towards him. It takes a courage for a girl like me to confess to a guy. In the middle of it, I learned that he knows my feelings towards him right from the start. For him, nothings changed. He still consider me as his friend and though he also has this special feelings for me, he thinks that it's not yet the right time for us. He don't want us to fall for each other just because of our candid moments together. He don't wants us to be in a relationship and ended up hurting each other.

     I remember crying that night. I cried for many reasons. He is just there for me. Comforting. He told me he is afraid for this time to come cause he doesn't know what else to say and he don't want me to change to him. Whatever I told him, his answers were all written in the song he composed for me (in my previous post).
Though the feeling is not reciprocated, I was glad that he understands how I feel and he is mature enough to still be there for me. I feel relieved now that I told him everything. No more what ifs in the future and most importantly our friendship never changed. I could feel that it gets stronger. I hope this will be the last time I will cry and expect from him.

     I may see a lot people happily in love right now, but I do believe that someday I will find the right guy for me and it's gonna be my turn :p. Best things in life, are always the ones worth waiting for.








Lunes, Mayo 27, 2013

"I've Found You"



     May 28, 2013. A friend so dear to me and a guy whom I've secretly fallen with in my previous post composed a song with his own melody that is intended for me. I have asked him a song that he promised to me a week before. One thing for sure this song will be forever cherished in my life. Anyway, here's how the lyrics goes:


"I've Found You"


Why is it hard to say
The words that I want you to know
And all this time that we've been through
Your the one that keeps me on knowing
that love is a real thing

Why is it hard for you, 
to feel the same as I do
And all this time we've been shared
Your laughter is like a love song
That keeps my heart from beating
And I'm happy that I've found you

I'm glad that I've found you...
I'm happy that I've found you...

And when the right time 
comes for me
I'll take the chance and face the risk
And tell you that...


I Love You...



     Geez....I am so touched with the song that it made me cry. It feels like something cold touches my heart. I don't know if the song means something else but what matters to me is the fact that he put some effort in it to think that I have only given him a day. It's very rare to know someone who'll do everything you've asked for, tolerate your mood swings (lol) and finds time to composed such a sweet song beyond his busy schedule. To you (you know who you are), I always appreciate all the things that you've done for me may it be so little, but the fact that you do it just to make me happy makes my heart melts and in the end let me tell you one thing...


I'm glad that I've found you...
(M.C.M)




" It's so sweet when someone
     with a good voice sings for you
  But it's sweeter when someone
     sings even if he's out of tune,
  Just to make you happy."



                     - re post







Martes, Mayo 7, 2013

PAIN AND HAPPINESS OF BEING IN LOVE


" Expectations is the root of all heart ache" - William Shakespeare.

     
    

      It hurts. That's what I'm going through right now. I never imagined myself being in love with a guy. Well at least, not now. I have gone through several crushes and at some sort think that I have fallen in love (though it's not love after all). 

     Before, I just used to listen to my friends sentiment's, comfort them when they had an argument with their bf's, gives pieces of advises and so on. I have witnessed them crying and going through pain. I considered myself lucky by then cause I don't have to go through with what they are feeling at that moment. Now, the irony is that I realized how they all felt during those times. Yes it truly hurts a lot. To loved someone and yet the feeling is not reciprocated at all. 

     I've met a guy though not personally but we had build this attachment to each other. We are close. We talked for several hours, shared secrets, laughed with each other jokes, sang together (if I know the song), he used to sing songs for me to the tune of his guitar, cared for me and I learned a lot from him....including falling in love <3. However, I recently learned from someone I knew of that he doesn't like me and that he likes someone else (awts!). When I heard about it, suddenly everything became blur. Him and me together. But through all this, I still never lose hope...until today when I heard it from him - he likes someone else. 

     I cried in my room. I seek comfort from my friends. Realization struck me that if he likes me in the first place, he would court me. But it's been months since we have met and still we remain as friends (how come I was blinded by this fact). My friends keep on telling me that I can move on and there are a lot of guys still out there. Better than him. Definitely I will, but not now. Time heals. I don't blame him at all and I'm not mad that he doesn't like me back. I never regret falling for him though at the start I always wonder why he came back and hope he never did if this is all I would get from him. I missed the time I was happy and single. But then I made a mistake of expecting from him and assuming things that he likes me too (he treats me special). 

     The funny thing is he comforted me too. He is there for me to cheer me up. All the while he doesn't know that he is the cause of all the pain I'm feeling right now. I tell him that I'm broken. Hurting. He knows the situation but never had an idea who the person is. I would never tell him that it was him. Not now, but someday when all my feelings for him is gone. I know you will tell me that I am insane if I would still get in touch with him. But it's not his fault and it would be unfair to him if I will distant myself just because I am broken hearted. I will continue talking with him (that's the only way for me to still be happy and feel near him). I would act like nothing has changed. Little by little I would teach my self that we aren't meant to be together. We are JUST FRIENDS. No more expectations from him. I know it would be hard at first but I can do it. I am strong and I have live my life without having a guy till at this very moment. 

     Yes, my friend is right. Despite all the pain, I have to keep loving. In some parts of the world there is one who is still not happy because he haven't meet me yet ;). When that time comes, no more "false alarm" that he is the one for me. Thank you guys for being with me...



Martes, Abril 23, 2013

"My Life In A Call Center"



      I've been working in call center industry for more than a year already. Prior to that, I never imagined myself working in such field. My relatives discouraged me, pointing out the negative sides (health declining, ear infections, etc.). It might be true - to some. But this never discourage me at all - luckily, I got the job. But just like the rest I experienced the ups and down in this industry.

     I remember one time, swearing myself not to ever stepped foot in call center business again (after failing in my first call center experienced). I was not happy at all. Though my salary exceeds the minimum rate for ordinary employees, still it don't satisfy me. The environment was no longer healthy for me. Then I came to realize that no matter how much I get to paid, no matter how pressure the job is, no matter how "irate" the customer is - I definitely don't care! All I want is a friendly-working environment. Though you'll get a lot of situations where you'll be arguing to "most" of your customers, it won't matter. Just think of it that they don't know you. They don't see you. On a latter run, you'll get used to it as an everyday situation. What matters is before and after shift, you'll get to bond with your teammates. Your happy with your working environment cause these are the people that you get to mingle with everyday - see face to face and chat with all the problems you've encountered within the day.

    So much for reminiscing he he.  Now let's talk about what makes call center agent "different" to an ordinary employee. Here's my list (feel free to comment so I can add it up as well and recognize you):


1. Zombies - funny I'm not pertaining to dead people eating humans' brain. Rather, call center agents are like zombies. We get a life at night time and spend sleeping at daytime :). Some may have a hard time adjusting to this kind of schedule - at first. But they'll get used to it somehow. I'm just lucky cause I never had the adjustment needed. My body gets used to it right away.

2. Morning drinkers - the usual thing is people have fun and go partying at night. Well not for us. Mostly, call center agents get a drink of one or two (or even more lol) during daytime. Isn't it kinda weird? Ha ha.

3. Wearing jacket even it's hot - yeah you read it right! Jackets are not just worn during cold times. Since we are working at night, we always carry something we can wear against the cold. Call center companies are always under centralized air conditioned, it's not for us employees but rather for the computers. And right after shift, some are tired or didn't even bother to take their jackets off. So if you've seen someone wearing jacket under the heat of the sun...hmm...you guess it right, they're mostly working in call centers.

4. Sunglasses - just like #3 sunglasses are worn to protect our eyes against too much sunlight...and yeah for those with sore eyes (ha ha). Anyway since I started working in this industry, it became my habit to wear sunglasses especially when I'm heading home. It help me cover my drowsy eyes from the public. Sometimes too it hides me from them from sleeping lol :).

5. Great taking short naps - some people hate to take short naps. They feel more drowsy after, gets lazy, and some complains they get head aches afterwards. Well what can I say? We are great short nappers (is there ever such a word? ha ha). What I mean is that we do appreciate getting sleep even if it's just for 30 mins. It free us for awhile from the demands of our work and gets our eyes to sleep and rest away against the radiation coming from computers. But one thing to remember, make sure not to overslept or you might find yourself waking up the next day! Kidding :)

6. "Socialite" - this is one thing I hate most on what people do think of "us". They thought we can afford to buy expensive stuff and that money is flowing :(. Though it's flattering, its still annoying somehow. Yes its definitely true that we earn much more than an ordinary employee especially for just start ups. We spend. Have fun with friends. Party and so on. But our life doesn't just revolve on those things. This might be true for some - to those who just spend their money all by themselves. In my case, I have a family to feed and siblings to send to school. That makes it worth living.

7. Smokers - I'm not talking in general but mostly, call center agents do smoke. I don't smoke let me tell you.  I hate cigarettes. Anyway, I ask my workmates as to why they smoke. I don't know if it's reasonable enough but they say it lessen stress. Hmm what ya' think?    

8. English speakers - it's a "must". We talk with Americans, British, or other Europeans. It's a must that we should know how to speak the universal language. It's the only way we can understand each other. Accent should be neutral but sometimes on the latter run, you'll get to adapt even their accent. Anyone could be good at this, you just have to be confident and practice some more.

9. Work, work, work - yes that's one thing we differ from other employees. We get to work during holidays or even in any circumstances such as calamities. But despite of it, we're looking forward on this occasions since its "double pay" (yahoo can't wait for the next pay out ha ha).

10.  "Unusual" words - hmm its just like with any other courses or jobs. We have our own vocabularies and term of words that we are only familiar with. Such words I encounter in this industry are irate (customers who are so mad and keeps on "fu*****" you over the phone ha ha), TL (it means team leader and not the usual true love abbreviation lol), queuing (waiting calls in line which makes me stress argh) and a few others.


     These are the few things that makes up my life in a call center. Being in this business is not permanent. Your standing in the company depends on how well you perform your job. Much worse, you might ended up in call center hopping.


     







Huwebes, Agosto 2, 2012

Animaniac Zone


          Anime is not only for kids but rather for all ages. Even though I'm turning 21 I'm still a huge fan of anime. Here are the list of some anime's I'm following with: 

1.) Slam Dunk
         Who will never forgot the red-haired bad tempered Sakuragi? Surely everyone will think of all the funny mess he'd done throughout the anime. And for girls out there who swoon over for this mysterious and super rookie Rukawa. But to top of all, my most favorite character in Slam Dunk is no other than Sendoh. The guy is so cool, humble, a great player and soooooooo cute!!! hehehe. The perfect guy for me (hahaha I wish there's someone out there in real life who's similar to him).

                       

2.) Hunter x Hunter
          This anime revolves around the four main protagonists Gon, Killua, Kurapika and Leorio. Each characters has their own story to tell on why they wanted to become a hunter. But one of the main reason why i watch this anime is the fact that I'm waiting so long for Gon and his father Gin Freecs to finally meet at last. This had successfully happened during the 13th Chairman Election Arc (if I'm not mistaken). Another reason is that I'm so attached to Gon and Killua's friendship. They have been together through thick and thin.

                                         

3.) Yamato Nadeshiko Wall Flower


         It's one of the anime I'm always excited to watch. The story is some sort of a comedy-romance plot. It all started from a horrible-weird lady named Sunako turned into a gorgeous lady by four handsome men Ranmaru, Takenaga, Kyohei and Yuki who are renting her Aunt's mansion. But of course the most awaiting scene for me is the "kilig" part for both main characters Sunako and Kyohei. Oh how I love both of them.


       
                           

                                         

                           
   
                This scene was shown at the end of the episodes. This could be made perfect if not                                           
                                                         for Sunako's nose-bleeding part!!!


4.) Magic Knight Ray earth     
             I remember watching this anime when i was still in elementary (not sure though). I used to sing the opening song even if I don't know exactly the lyrics (LOL). But anyway I love the trio together with their male counterparts (especially Fuu and Ferio). This story centers on three young girls named Hikaru, Umi, and Fuu  who were brought to save Cephiro. 

                      


5.) Dragon Ball Z
            Well this is the longest story anime Iv'e known so far. Heard of Super Saiyan? They are the most invincible characters against all characters in different anime's. The anime reveals Guko's journey since he was young, until he got married (with Chi-chi), have sons (Gohan and Gutten) and a grandchild (Pan). Of course this wouldn't be completed without the never-ending powerful enemies he fought with in every episode that makes him much stronger (M2M- many to mention I mean hihi). The anime wouldn't make sense as well if not because of his friends who are always there to help him. But what makes this anime so popular to all ages is the fact that its been shown to television in each generation (who do you think would ever forgot this anime huh?)

      
    

                                                    


       
  


         

       Well there are so many anime's I've watched before that i wanted to post here as well. But i guess I  still needs to refresh my past first hahaha. This is all for today but I'll be right back!!!